Tostitos To Open Lime Dust-Making Plant In Chesterfield County

Frito-Lay announced plans today for a plant just south of Richmond that will employ more than 1,000 workers in an operation dedicated solely to the production of lime dust, a seasoning that is later blasted onto the snacking company’s popular Hint of Lime-flavored Tostitos tortilla chips.

tostitos“To make just one little chip with only a ‘hint’ of lime actually takes a huge amount of not only limes, but elbow grease,” said Frito-Lay spokesman Jim Robinson, noting at least 100 citrus fruits and 200 workers are needed to create just one bag of Hint of Lime Tostitos.

Robinson said the lime crematorium, as Frito-Lay calls it, was needed to help Tostitos keep up with the Hint of Lime all-white corn chip demand, which is so high that it cannot be measured by modern economic analysis, or even plotted on a basic demand curve.

Richmond officials praised Tostitos for its move to the area, saying the lime crematorium will fill the gap left by the loss of several notable Fortune 500 companies, and will more than likely provide the surrounding community with donated bags of Hint of Lime Tostitos.

And hopefully some salsa.

“This is particularly a great project for anyone who likes Tostitos, which is, of course, everyone,” said Greg Wingfield, president of the Greater Richmond Partnership economic development group, as he attempted to remove the cap off a jar of Tostitos-brand Nacho Cheese Dip.  “And if I could get the top off this stupid jar, I myself could dig into this bag that’s been calling my name for the past few hours.”

Added Wingfield, sticking the jar between his knees for increased dip container-opening leverage: “Aaarrrggghhh.”

While no actual chips will be produced at the new facility, Frito-Lay said the local plant will have employees testing alternative chip-dipping techniques, the aerodynamics of jars, and how to dip broken chips or chip crumbs into salsa without getting the salsa or cheese sauce all over your hands and insides of your fingers.

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3 thoughts on “Tostitos To Open Lime Dust-Making Plant In Chesterfield County

Add yours

  1. Look for a sharp rise in local cases of “Lime Dust Lung” in 10 years or so. Workers should make sure that this condition will be covered by their HMO.

  2. And I thought the tweet asking God to bless the scientist who figured out to harvest dust from limes made me LOL . . .

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